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Showing posts from October, 2017

Victim's State of Mind

I first remember learning about the domestic violence issue as a result of watching "The Burning Bed" TV movie starring Farah Fawcett.  An avid reader at the time, I also read the book by the same name.  The movie and the case, in fact, served as turning point for domestic violence victims and brought the issue into the light.  Francine Hughes was ultimately acquitted by using the insanity defense.  Her attorneys argued that years of abuse had affected her thinking and her judgement. As an undergraduate, I decided to delve into this topic a little deeper and actually wrote one of my research papers about the insanity defense.  I wanted to become an attorney, so this topic was of interest to me.  I learned that the insanity defense was not that widely used and actually was an ineffective defense in many cases. In fact, in order to be effective, the insanity defense would have to demonstrate underlying mental illness as a result of abuse. Like many people, I had wond

It's Okay to Acknowledge Your Weaknesses

At nearly every job interview I have ever had, I was asked: "What are your strengths?" Then, "What are your weaknesses?" In this focus on our strengths, everyone is special, everyone gets a trophy era, we are led to believe that our strengths are what makes us great. We have to live in strengths, always be positive, always leave things in the right light, never burn bridges and a million other cliches that we have accepted as part of not only our professional vernacular but as part of our professional beings. We shudder when we are asked that inevitable question, "What are your weaknesses?" We have been told to try to choose something we can turn into a positive, something that will make us feel less ashamed, less vulnerable, and allow us to still focus on our strengths, build bridges, and make us look like somebody who maybe will fit in with that organization. Fingers crossed. This came to mind to me today as I read Tom Wolfe's essay, "The Me D

What is Financial Abuse?

As Domestic Violence Awareness Month starts to wind down, I felt I would be remiss if I did not write a post regarding financial abuse.  Financial abuse occurs in nearly 98% of all domestic violence relationships and may be an undercurrent, underlying theme, or even the first types of abuse a woman experiences.  I am using the term woman because it is generally women who experience financial abuse. There are several articles and statements out there that give broad examples of financial abuse.  However, in order to truly understand financial abuse, it should be examined more at a micro level, as it is experienced by the victim. The following items separately may not constitute financial abuse. However, if these incidents happen on a regular basis to one person, they may constitute financial abuse. What Financial Abuse Is -A woman may not be allowed to work outside of the home or for some reason obtaining work is difficult for her. Each time a woman gets a job, she is forced to quit

The Difference Between Pranks and Bullying

One of the ways that bullying can be prevented is through understanding what constitutes bullying. In this way, bullying behaviors can be prevented. Bullying behaviors may be passed off as "pranks" to victims, authorities or school officials.  However, there are certain criteria that should be considered when determining if an action is a prank or bullying.  The three criteria are intent, reaction and recurrence . Intent When considering whether or not something is a prank or bullying, the purpose -- or intent -- should be examined. If the intent is merely to cause a prank, then the intent is to provide some kind of action that may be found humorous or minor to all parties involved.  The following is an example of a prank. An organized coworker arrives at her desk in the morning.  Her coworkers have turned all of her reference materials upside down.  She sits down at her desk and starts turning all the books right side up without even thinking.  The coworkers laugh and say